Process

A general overview of my decluttering process and a guide to the "maybe" pile.

This is my general approach towards decluttering. This process is nuanced because everyone has their own personal preference, values, and sentiments. Please note it’s not about becoming organized and tidy, though that can happen in the process.

Organization and tidiness are not my default. The rare treat of being able to explode my stuff in a corner of a room while traveling was ~chef’s kiss~

My process starts with setting an intention: what am I really trying to accomplish? An initial response is to reduce clutter, but to reflect more deeply, what is driving this desire to declutter? For example, do I want to declutter because I feel a lack of space, or perhaps do I feel overwhelmed when I am reminded of all the tasks I need to do? Once I have a better understanding, I start taking note of my routines and weekly activities, such as how often I do laundry, go to the library, work out, etc., and how I live my life day-to-day. This inventory helps me see how my actions (or lack thereof) influence my intentions. If I feel a lack of spaciousness, is it because I’m not prioritizing time for myself? If I feel anxious and stressed, is it because I am constantly doing and have no time for rest? Using this information illuminates what I need to declutter or how much I need to declutter to make space for my intention.

When I begin going through my things, I focus on categories of items during a given timeframe, or until I feel like I’ve made all the decisions I can make within a day, aka decision fatigue kicks in. The latter stopping point for me is when I hit a roadblock and can’t move forward with other things. Sometimes, I’ll start in one category and recognize I’m not ready to go through it yet. That’s OK! I’ll shift focus onto another and try to keep the momentum going, or I call it a day and rest, and later focus on processing whatever came up, if needed. Trust your intuition and your process — it’s not always going to be linear or perfect. Remember, it doesn’t have to be all or nothing.

I’ll sort out my items into these three categories: let go, maybe, keep. Doing this helps build the muscle to declutter, as the easy wins build momentum and define a baseline of preferences. Now for the maybes, I assess how the item fits in my current life, especially based on usage, preferences, and functionality. I use the information I’ve gathered from my routine, lifestyle, and intention to discern if I should keep an item or not. For instance, I had 15+ sleep shirts. When I reference my laundry routine and how often I change my sleep shirts, I realized I don’t need more than 5-6 shirts, and that includes “worst-case scenarios” of skipping a laundry day and having extra to rotate in, so I don’t wear my shirts out all at once. Honestly, I kept some shirts for the sentimental value and placed them in storage as “archive”, a concept I picked up from Hannah Louis Poston, but the rest, I donated, repurposed, or threw away.  

There are items I just don’t know how it fits in my life. I go back and forth about letting go and keeping. The maybe are really just maybes. It’s ok to make the “wrong” decision. I’ve decluttered things I’ve regretted and kicked myself in the butt multiple times over the yearning for a lost item. I’ve kept things I still don’t use, don’t know what to do with, and still can’t let go. These emotional responses (and reactions) give me insight into my preferences and help me discern what to buy or avoid in the future. These are all steps towards becoming a more conscious consumer.

For a guide to go through the “maybes,” you can read more below. I hope this inspires you to be more compassionate with yourself and to become a more conscious consumer by taking inventory of what’s aligned, not aligned, and maybe aligned in your life.

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A guide to the “maybe” pile

Here are some general questions I ask myself during the process of sorting:

• Does this item need to be replaced?

  • Has it been dull in a way that doesn’t give it character, but instead makes me feel more frustrated or less satisfied?

  • For clothes, does it not quite fit right? Have you been telling yourself you’ll get it hemmed or tailored, and that’s not in your usual routine? Time to let go.

• Do I genuinely want this object (without it impacting my identity), or do I think I should own it? *see more below

  • If I didn’t have this item, would it take away a feeling of self-worth, identity, or belonging?

    • With books, for example, do I feel like I should read something? What would it say about me if I do or don’t? Is this something I can borrow from the library or rent when the time comes?

    • Come back to your intention. Would keeping books you will eventually read and projects you haven’t started or half-finished (with no hope of finishing) help you feel less overwhelmed with tasks? Does holding onto a gifted item because it feels too political to let go give you the space you crave?

• Can I use it for multiple purposes or wear/use it for different occasions?

  • Does it go with other things I own? Would I need to buy something else to match it? If it requires an extra step of buying something else, it’s not worth it to keep it, in my opinion.

    • Examples: clothes that can be made into multiple outfits, not just paired with one specific item that doesn’t seem to be available when you need it.

• How often do I use this?

  • If not often, is it still something I know I’ll use in the future (i.e., dinnerware and serveware for events/parties)? Not to be confused with: one day I will use this item when X happens (external or vague circumstances outside my control)

    • Examples of holding on based on external/vague circumstances:

      • The excuse: When I move/have my own home

        • Reality: Not realistic within the foreseeable future

      • The excuse: When I go to [insert event]

        • Reality: Uncertain when this event will happen, never gone, or went once and don’t make the effort to go again

        • Example: I’ll wear this to a wedding, but the outfit is out-of-date/slightly doesn’t fit right, or never seems to fit the dress code

      • The excuse: When I [fill in blank]

        • Reality: Actions aren’t aligned, it’s not coming from a genuine intention (i.e., ego), or holding onto it out of scarcity and not out of alignment/authentic inspiration

      • Bottomline: There’s no use for the item if it’s not being used

• My personal examples:

  • Holding onto a box of my mom’s extra clay from her ceramics/pottery stash for “when I learn ceramics”

    • Reality: I had made no effort to sign up for a class and genuinely didn’t want to. Ultimately, the clay developed mold and became unusable (aka trash), when I could have given it to a friend who could have made something beautiful with it.

    • Instead, I could integrate the sentimental value of the item and appreciate the pottery and ceramic pieces my mom made.

  • My go-to excuse for clothes is “when I learn how to sew, I can modify this to fit me better or make a bigger version that fits.”

    • Reality: I’m not learning how to sew or hem/tailor anything. Either I make the time and budget to get it tailored (within two weeks), or I declutter it entirely.

  • Another excuse for clothes is “in case I go out.”

    • Reality: LOL, I do not. I can easily wear something else from my closet and maybe feel uncomfortable that I’m not 20 for a couple of hours of my life, but continue living my life afterwards.

  • For crafting, I have a desire to craft with certain things

    • Reality: If I have forgotten about this item or not used it within a certain timeframe that feels memorable, I’m not going to craft with it.

  
  

*When I think I should hold onto an item because I paid a lot for it (Hides)

This one is haarrrd! However, keeping the item just because you feel bad letting it go out of shame or guilt causes more harm than good. You’re nurturing these intense feelings by not confronting your mistakes to learn and grow. You can try to make space to use this item within the week (if reasonable) and see if you actually can implement it into your routine. If not, be honest and have the courage to confront yourself about what is authentic for you. Make space to process any emotions that come up and be compassionate with yourself. Use this as an imprint for consumer wisdom. The more I address this, the more I’m able to manage impulsive spending or acknowledge needs I’m not actually fulfilling, and then I find better ways to actually fulfill them.

A personal example was when I had to admit to myself that I wasn’t going to pursue what I studied for my bachelor’s degree (geology). This meant going through my college textbooks. I was resistant, but I didn’t have the space to hold all my textbooks and could use any extra money from reselling them. I knew looking at them made me feel anxious, and I felt like I had failed or wasted so much money attending college. I can tell myself that’s normal, everyone else can tell me that, but the sight of these textbooks brought up a different narrative internally. I sat with that discomfort and addressed it; I grieved a part of myself where I had made geology an identity. I was able to sell some textbooks, but not for much, as newer editions came out. Now, I don’t miss those textbooks at all. I still have the geological knowledge I’ve retained (or am reminded of) without the textbooks. I made space for more meaningful things in my life, including textbooks with subjects that interest me and enrich me. That said, I still kept a textbook on paleoclimatology, as I was — and still am — interested in. Have I opened this textbook at all since going through that declutter? No, but I’m still OK with holding onto it for now. Remember, it’s not all or nothing. It’s recognizing where you're at and what’s within your bandwidth for change.